(by Shawn Adler)
The Idiot Defense. The Gay Panic Defense. For goodness sakes, the TWINKIE Defense. Throughout the history of jurisprudence there have been defense strategies so new, so outside the box, that they have passed from the musky halls of justice and into common parlance.
Questioning 24-year-old prosecution witness Simha Jamison on behalf of R. Kelly, defense attorney Sam Adam Jr. may have unwittingly added another to the ever growing list: The "Little Man" Defense.
"I ain't gonna get in the middle of R. Kelly's trial," Shawn Wayans recently told MTV News, a heavy tone of incredulity in his voice. "[But] I'm curious."
Cross-examining the witness on her positive identification of Kelly in a video which allegedly shows him having sex with an underage girl, Adam suggested that Kelly's head could have been superimposed on someone else's body, a la the 2006 Wayans Brothers comedy "Little Man," where Marlon Wayans was digitally manipulated to look like a 1-year-old child.
"They put the head of Marlon Wayans on a midget and it looked real, didn't it?" Adam asked.
"Pretty interesting," Sean, who co-starred in the film, chuckled.
The difficulty of the endeavor makes the question all the more ludicrous, Wayans implied, detailing to MTV News the extraordinary effort it takes to accomplish that sort of digital trickery.
"It's not easy. It's very complicated and it takes several effects guys to help you plot that out," he said, referring to the need for identical camera moves throughout several different shots for composite matches. "You'd need tons of greenscreen. It'd be very expensive — the production would [be prohibitive]."
Still, Wayans couldn't help but stand in awe of the audacity of the question — but just don't call Little Man as a witness.
"Can't knock a guy for trying! He's very creative," Wayans laughed. "I just hope Little Man don't get subpoenaed into court — he wouldn't be a good alibi."