New year, new game. How about it? We get that enterprising DJs love to mash up Jay-Z and random rock acts. First it was the Beatles, then Coldplay, and now, ugh, Radiohead.
While these have been entertaining — and the Beatles one put superproducer Danger Mouse on the map — There can definitely be too much of a good thing. So, in an effort to head off the next bedroom bastardizer at the pass before he or she decides to meld some more Jigga peanut butter with someone else's musical chocolate, here are mash-up concepts we never, ever want to hear or write about:
— Mötley Jigga: "Jay's got a song called 'Girls, Girls, Girls,' and Mötley Crüe has one too! Dude, that would be awesome!" No, it wouldn't.
— Mr. Jay: Nobody wants to hear Counting Crows' frat-jangle rock mixed with Jay's "Mr. Carter." Nobody.
— Jay's Addiction: Imagine how cool Jigga's beats from "Stop" would sound over Jane's Addiction guitarist Dave Navarro's licks from that band's song of the same name! They wouldn't ...
— Jay Geils Band: We don't want to "Freeze Frame" on that.
— My Morning Jigga: There is not a bong big enough in the world to make me want to hear "Dirt Off Your ... Librarian."
Are we clear on this?
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