Ah, the Grammys. A time for choreographers of overblown production numbers to ply their trade, for Neil Portnow to put all those “public speaking” courses to good use and for various talking heads to pontificate endlessly about “the music biz.”
See, if there’s one thing that’s never in short supply at the Grammys, it’s people willing to talk about the Grammys. Producers, writers, hilarious gap-toothed indie comedians — they’re all available, ready to ramble on about just how great “Single Ladies” was. This is how the entertainment business runs, after all.
The only problem is, we waited too long and couldn’t actually book any of them. We run a tight ship ’round these parts.
Needless to say, we were scrambling to find anyone to talk about the Grammys … when, suddenly, a thought dawned on us: “Why don’t we just use some of the many talented, telegenic and intelligent people who work in the MTV Newsroom! That way, we wouldn’t have to pay them!”
It was a brilliant plan. So we assembled a crack team of Grammy experts: Pop writer Jocelyn Vena, producer Andrew Ross Rowe, production assistant Rya Backer, production manager (and resident Guido) Adam Stewart, with myself serving as the humble moderator. We got together, we debated just who would take home the Golden Gramophones, and this was the end result. They edited out a lot of the cursing. Anyway, here’s what our Expert Grammy Panel had to say about Sunday night’s show … for better, or much (much) worse.
Who will win the big prizes at Sunday night’s Grammy Awards? Leave your votes in the comments!