Sometimes it’s hard to figure out which semi-finalists deserve to go home on “American Idol.” This week? Not so much. The grim parade of bad, sad and WTF? was Macy’s Day long this week, led by repeat visits from a few contestants who must have lucky rabbit feet sewn into their tracheas or compromising pictures of Simon Cowell and his enormous (alleged) Hummel figurine collection.
Either way, there’s no doubt who should go home this week. Note we said should, because America has gotten it wrong before.
Number one on the list is toothy cowgirl Haeley Vaughn. Yes, she is cute as a button and so deliriously upbeat that she literally can’t stop smiling, but let’s face it: She’s a terrible, terrible singer. Even with a swing at a song that should be a slam dunk for her (fellow teen Miley Cyrus’ “The Climb”) Vaughn was a train wreck. The performance was a shower of bum notes and her suddenly very noticeable lisp threatened to drown out half the lyrics. The judges called it on this one: Haeley needs to go back in the oven and cook for another year or two.
On the male side, John Park has had a good run, but he has proven once again that his voice is like a blunt instrument of musical torture. His cover of John Mayer’s “Gravity” was limp, and telling us English is his second language doesn’t really explain why he can’t find a note that isn’t flat or tortured. Sorry, Park Rangers, but it’s time for Mountie John to get back to Purple Haze.
Sometimes a contestant appears to have the goods but just can’t figure out how to play the game. Case in point: Jermaine Sellers. The sanctified soul man has great pipes (and apparently a hotline to his savior), but he just doesn’t get how this works. He has shot himself in the foot so many times his jazz shoes must look like Crocs at this point. He’s a on race to the bottom with Todrick Hall for least likable “Idol” semi-finalist, and I predict his takedown of Marvin Gaye’s “What’s Going On” will be the last we hear from him.
Michelle Delamor seems like a lovely young lady, but I suspect that she hasn’t made any inroads with fans because of a rather bland personality and really odd song choices. An R&B diva cover of “With Arms Wide Open” by Creed? Really? I mean, props for thinking outside the box, but when the best thing judges can say is that your outfit was cute, it’s time to start packing up your stuff.
What do you think? Who should be shown the door on “American Idol” this week? Leave your votes in the comments!