If you're like us, you probably greeted the news that the New York Racing Association had jettisoned Frank Sinatra's "New York, New York" in favor of Jay-Z's "Empire State of Mind" at this weekend's Belmont Stakes with a mixture of glee and elation.
After all, gambling is a wonderful pastime, one that has sadly fallen out of favor with kids today. So if it takes replacing a stodgy standard like "New York, New York" with a hip tune like "Empire" to get America's youth back to the track, well, then we're all for it. Because truly, we know of no better cure for juvenile diabetes than sweating out a 5,7,2,8 Superfecta.
Anyway, in an attempt to force the hand of other Racing Associations around the country (we imagine their boardrooms are made up entirely of old dudes in satin jackets, BTW), we've thrown together a quick list of even more songs that the kids are totally in to these days ... and, as an added bonus, all of these are actually about horse racing. Because the time for change is now. Out with the old, in with the new. Don't do it for us. Do it for the children.
The Hold Steady, "Chips Ahoy!"
This is a song about a girl who uses her psychic powers to predict the winners of horse races. Oh, and as an added bonus, she then uses her winnings to get exorbitantly, extraordinarily high. Wholesome fun, indeed!
Jurassic 5, "A Day At The Races"
There are no actual mentions of horse racing on this one, but, hey, Big Daddy Kane contributes a verse! And one of the dudes from J5 calls himself "the fly Casanova with the frankincense odor," which means he smells better than 75 percent of the people at any OTB.
The Rapture, "Out of the Races and Onto the Tracks"
The basic lyrics of this song: "Get yourself together/ Shake shake shake shake shake shake shake shake shake shake shake shake!" Now that's horse racing!
Rick Ross, "Maybach Music 2"
Okay, so this one isn't really about horse racing, but it does feature Ricky rapping that he's "got so many horses, b-----s call me polo." Truly, the realest s--t he ever wrote. And the most horse-racing friendly.
Any song by Band of Horses
Or Horse the Band, for that matter.
Beastie Boys, "Paul Revere"
Hey, Mike D rides a horse in this song, so it counts in our books. Also, we think it would be awesome to hear the crowd at Churchill Downs rap along to lines like "I did it like this, I did it like that, I did it with a Whiffle ball bat."