If the Ancient Greeks taught us anything, its that the Olympics are only as good as their mascots. Way back in 776 BC, organizers of the first Olympiad chose a lovable pair of nude Greco-Roman Wrestlers named Spiros and Adelphos to represent their games, but the limitations of the animated duo were quickly realized when no one wanted to buy a T-Shirt with two sweaty, olive-oil coated cartoons on it.

None of that is actually true, but it's not a stretch to say that not much has improved since the days of Spiros and Adelphos. Unofficially, the first Olympic Mascot was Schuss, a "stylized skier" used to promote the 1968 Winter Olympics in Grenoble, France (officially, it was Waldi, a multi-hued dachschund who repped the '72 Munich Summer Games,) and Since then, things have gotten progressively weirder. Everything from garish, top-hat clad Bald Eagles and computer-generated blobs to "Cubist Catalan Sheepdogs" and humanized snowballs have been thrust onto the International stage, printed on T-shirts and tote bags, and, at the conclusion of each Olympic games, quickly forgotten about. After all, it's rather difficult to get very passionate about an anthropomorphized ball of snow.

And now, with the 2010 Winter Olympics upon us, a new cast of characters have taken their places on that stage: A trio of super-cuddly critters (and one tiny sidekick) named Miga, Quatchi and Sumi who are -- at the very least -- the most Pokemon-y mascots of all time. Seriously, they are adorable. We want to smash them up and put them in our pockets.

And because of that, we've developed a bit of a soft spot for the little guys (and gal). So, in an effort to make you love them just as much as we do, we've compiled a handy guide to the Vancouver mascots. After the jump, learn how you can tell the difference between a Miga and a MukMuk. Because to know them is to truly love them. Read More...

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On Friday night, the eyes of the world were on Vancouver's BC Place, as the games of the XXI Winter Olympics got underway with a lavish, joyous opening ceremony that had soul, showmanship and plenty of Wayne Gretzky.

Some 60,000 people packed inside the arena (this was, after all, the first indoor opening ceremony), and, unfortunately, I was not one of them. But I was next door, at the Molson Canadian Hockey House, a raucous viewing party/concert/celebration of all things Canuck that featured plenty of beer, ladies clad in skin-tight hockey dresses, and a piano painted with the maple leaf. It was a pretty excellent time, so I started to write an impromptu LiveTweet of the entire event -- and, by proxy, the opening ceremonies -- over on the @MTVNews Twitter account.

And since you probably weren't glued to your computer during the ceremony, I figured I'd recap some of the highlights on the Newsroom blog. Also, let's just say the entire MTV News crew enjoyed themselves a bit too much last night, and this is a pretty easy thing to knock off first-thing Saturday morning. So, come with me as we relive the best moments from the opening ceremony ... like the time I mistook Canadian Governor General Michaelle Jean for comedienne Wanda Sykes. Yeah, it was that kind of night. On to the Tweets!

**Trying to make it to Molson ... security has the streets locked down. Scalpers selling tix for 700 Canadian pesos. That's like $20,000 U.S. or something.

**We made it!!! Only 20 minutes late!!! #olympiclivetweetfail

**It's officially the "Indigenous Persons" portion of the opening ceremonies, BTW. Followed, of course, by athlete intro time!!!

**Albania and Algeria have one athlete each. The Algerian dude looks like Paolo Nutini.

Read more culturally insensitive jokes after the jump. Read More...

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At tonight’s Winter Olympics opening ceremony, the men and women of the U.S. team will enter Vancouver's B.C. Place Stadium looking very much like they just stepped out of Lake Placid circa 1932.

And that's just how the folks at Ralph Lauren want it to be.

Once again, they've designed the outfits U.S. athletes will wear during the opening and closing ceremonies. Much like they did two years ago at the Beijing summer games, they've drawn heavily from the past, but with a modern, fashionable twist on things. It's something MTV News learned firsthand, when Lauren head of marketing David Lauren gave us an exclusive preview of the line at the official Team U.S.A. store.

"We are always trying to find inspiration from some of the past Olympic games," Lauren said. "So these outfits take inspiration from the '30s and '40s — the heyday of the American teams — and add it a modern sensibility. We're always rooted in the classics, but with a modern twist."

Which means ultra-warm, retro-leaning vests, well-worn knit caps and chunky black boots in tonight's events, while the closing ceremony will feature a classic, contemporary and clean look with sweaters, plaids and berets. It's forward-thinking (yet backward-looking) high fashion that is sure to be talked about in the coming days.

As is the case with everything Ralph Lauren does, it's high-concept, too. "We worked closely with the athletes and the U.S. Olympic Committee on the designs," Lauren explained. "They always wanted to do something classic — the idea of Americans as ambassadors on the world stage. The athletes taking on a bigger meaning than just being sports people."

MTV News is on the ground in Vancouver all week, so stay tuned for more coverage of the 2010 Winter Olympics.

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Not even a blizzard could stop us. Early Thursday morning, after five hours spent watching the snowbanks build on the runway of JFK airport (and six more spent banging around the turbulence-filled night), MTV News finally landed in Vancouver, site of the 2010 Winter Olympics. And though we were all tired, we hit the ground running. After all, this is the biggest stage in the entire world, and it was our time to shine.

Okay, so actually we checked in to our apartment (no hotels left in town) and crashed out for about six hours. But then he got down to business, spending the day with three U.S. athletes (skeleton racers Katie Uhlaender and Noelle Pikus-Pace and bobsledder and U.S. National Guard Sergeant Mike Kohn), interviewing legends like Picabo Street and Dan Jansen and getting a tour of the official Team USA Shop (given by none other than Ralph Lauren's son David).

We also met Jeb Bush's daughter (you know, the model one), traded U.S. Olympic pins with a Vancouver shopkeeper and drove some of the U.S. athletes back to the heavily-guarded Olympic Village. Sway even promised one Olympian he'd learn how to snowboard while he was here, too. Vancouver is alive with energy and excitement: The streets are packed, bars and clubs are booming late into the night, and the opening ceremonies for the games don't even happen until tonight.

And while we'll have more on our adventures throughout the weekend — including that tour of the Team USA Shop, where you can catch a glimpse at the outfits our guys and gals will be wearing during the opening ceremony — we just wanted to take this time to let you know that we're here, we're ready, and we're never going to be afraid of a little blizzard ever again.

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This morning, at precisely 8:29 a.m., I received an email from Iamamiwhoami.

It came exactly one week after I wrote this borderline-creepy "open letter" to the person (or persons) responsible for the maddeningly addictive viral campaign, and, though his or her note didn't exactly explain much … or, really, anything, I'm still sort of reeling from it.

See, the e-mail contained a link to a brand-new video (the fourth in the series), in which a mud-smeared female gnaws at a tree, sings along to a thumping, chime-y electro track and then hovers triumphantly above the stump the fallen timber. There are also shots of puppies frolicking in the snow and the sound of flies buzzing. I am not sure what any of it means.

Also included with the video was another string of numerals (13.1.14.4.18.1.7.15.18.1.1110), which, when using the English Alphabet (with 1 representing A, 2 meaning B and so on), spells out "Mandragora," which, according to Wikipedia, are "familiar demons who appear in the figures of little men without beards."

So, needless to say, I'm sort of frightened now. Not to mention honored. Because whoever Iamamiwhoami is, he or she has decided to include me in their little game. And I would like to let them know that I am ready for whatever they've got next. As I wrote in my open letter, "I'm not too proud to come crawling back to you. Even if it means crawling all the way to Vanuatu." Obviously, they know how to reach me … and whenever they do, I'll respond. I'm slightly terrified. And I'm waiting.

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Every season on "America Idol," there is a moment when a contestant distances him- or herself from the field, when they become instantly memorable — perhaps even bankable — stars. Think Adam Lambert's emotive take on "Mad World" or David Cook's soulful rendition of "Billy Jean." These are performances that made viewers begin to think "Wait a minute, I like this guy."

On Tuesday night's (February 9) "Idol," we had what many are considering to be the first moment of season nine. Andrew Garcia, the likeable, neck-tatted dad, wowed pretty much everyone with his acoustic version of Paula Abdul's "Straight Up."

The performance earned high praise from the judges (Kara Dioguardi proclaimed it "genius") and almost instantly Garcia became the contestant everyone was watching.

But not me.

Because while I was impressed with the song, I had actually started paying attention to Garcia during his Los Angeles audition for something that had less to do with his gangbanging parents, his adorable family or his singing ability as it did with the fact that Andrew Garcia looks exactly like former Fall Out Boy guitar tech Brian Keith Diaz. Like, alarmingly, freakishly so. The two could be brothers.

For proof, here's a side-by-side comparison (with Garcia on the left and Diaz on the right).

Eerie, right? And while I had only gotten acquainted with Diaz during Fall Out Boy's ill-fated Antarctica trip, those who know him best tend to agree that the comparisons to Garcia are not just warranted, but basically spot on.

Or, as Pete Wentz put it in an e-mail: "Haha. Yeah."

Totally. Oh, and Diaz can sing, too, as evidenced by this grainy clip of him joining FOB on a cover of OutKast's "Hey Ya." So, who knows, maybe he and Garcia are related.

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On Wednesday, just hours before Lil Wayne was due to be formally sentenced and begin a one-year prison sentence for a gun possession charge, his attorney shocked pretty much everyone when she announced her client needed emergency dental surgery and that the proceedings would have to be postponed until March 2.

Perhaps even more shocking was that the judge agreed and allowed the sentencing to be moved to next month. And in that moment, Wayne's cracked tooth officially became legendary.

Anyone can bail on a hearing citing "exhaustion," but it takes a true genius to cook up a scheme like "emergency dental surgery" (did Wayne crack his tooth on the way into court?!?) And while we're not questioning the validity of his claims, well, let's just say we're adding Weezy's name to a rather prominent list of other stars who managed to get out of unpleasant legal proceedings with, what one could generously describe as "questionable" ailments. Here are some of the minds behind the Greatest Get-Out-Of-Court Excuses in recent history.

Michael Jackson
The late King of Pop was perhaps the Michael Jordan of flimsy excuses, as highlighted by the whoppers he cooked up in 2002 as he was being sued by a concert promoter for breach of contract. While Jackson did take the stand during the trial, he apparently found the experience incredibly unpleasant and spent the next month bailing on appearances due to a pair of rather nasty spider bites on his hand and foot. The first bit didn't prevent him from traveling to Germany (the site of his infamous "baby dangling" incident), but the second was apparently so severe that Jackson was forced to show up to hearings on crutches. Expert entomologists — they study insects, BTW — didn't buy the story, with one dismissing Jackson's injury as "a bunch of crap."

Paris Hilton
In 2007, after she had already been sentenced to serve 45 days in jail for violating the terms of her parole (stemming from a 2006 reckless-driving charge), Hilton was scheduled to testify in a $10 million slander and libel suit being brought against her by actress Zeta Graff. Read More...

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Hot Chip would make a pretty killer rock band. They just need to work on their set list a bit. Sure, you can play some of the new stuff, but you've also got to sprinkle in the hits. You can totally do an encore, but you've got to have one bombastic number left in the bag. After all, the kids need something to buzz about as they make their way to the exits.

All of that was abundantly clear on Friday night (February 5) at New York's Highline Ballroom, as Hot Chip returned to the stage after a brief hiatus for a MySpace Secret Show in support of their brand-new album One Life Stand. It was a rather excellent rock show, with epic light design, massive backbeats and even the occasional guitar thrown in for good measure, but the guys could probably learn a thing or two about pacing.

Opening with a pair of rather jittery songs from Stand — "Thieves in the Night" and "Hand Me Down Your Love" — Hot Chip filled the Highline with warbling synths and pealing organs, the room bathed in a noirish purple haze. Frontman Alexis Taylor, dressed in a long purple shirt and yellow pants (the former of which he'd eventually shed to reveal a pretty excellent Wendy's tank top), unfurled his impressively lithe pipes, crooning lines like "Baby I've lost you here in the crowd/Open your arms, I want to be found" while heads bopped and a million tiny smart phones were held aloft.

From there, the band switched into "Boy From School" (turning the song into a Culture Club-esque exercise in synth balladry) and "One Pure Thought" (which showed off some of Al Doyle's jangly guitar and threatened to lift the temperature of the room by several degrees Celsius).

Things shifted down from there, with another Stand track, the downright dour "Alley Cats," and then old favorite "Ready For The Floor," which was given a majestic, down-tempo makeover on this night.

But then we got hot, the band bobbing heads and going five-synths wide on "Over and Over," which roiled on electro and guitars and built to a thumping climax, with the guys stop-starting on a dime as lights blinked on and off in perfect unison. Read More...

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The Vegas oddsmakers have the Indianapolis Colts as five point favorites heading into Sunday night's Super Bowl matchup against the New Orleans Saints. And, well, I'm inclined to believe them. Sure, Drew Brees and the Saints might be the 21st century version of "The Greatest Show on Turf," but the last time we checked, Super Bowl XLIV is being played on natural grass. Not to mention the fact that, at this stage in his career, we wouldn't bet against Peyton Manning if our lives depended on it. He's like the anti-Brett Favre.

Anyway, while reality seems to favor the Colts, we here at MTV News have are using another factor to determine who'll be hoisting the Lombardi Trophy on Sunday: Music. Or, more specifically, the musicians that hail from each team's city. The only problem here is, well, the matchup is a little uneven. New Orleans has got music in its blood, while Indianapolis, well ... is the 14th largest city in the U.S.!

So we had to widen the net a bit, to the entire state of Indiana. And we spotted them 10 points. Still, we're not sure if it would be close even then. Unlike the real Super Bowl, we predict a New Orleans romp. So, submitted for your wagering pleasure, in 11-on-11 sides (just like real football!), here's who we've assembled to represent each city. And, yes, we know three of the dudes repping Indiana are dead. There's a reason they're 10-point underdogs.

Indiana

Axl Rose: Born in Lafayette, Indiana, but beat a path for the mean streets of Los Angeles (as seen in the "Welcome to the Jungle" video, though we doubt Axl actually had straw sticking out of his mouth). Probably the QB of this team, though, as evidenced by the last decade-plus of Guns N' Roses, his decision-making skills are questionable at best.

John Mellencamp: Hailing from Seymour, Indiana, he's the cagey veteran looking for one last shot at glory. Though, due to his prodigious appetite for cigarettes, he may have lost a step or 16.

Shannon Hoon: Deceased former frontman of Blind Melon. Let's make him the punter. Special teams are an important phase of the game too.
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The Super Bowl! Just typing the name is giving me chills. Like most red-blooded Americans, I can't get enough football, and Sunday's tilt between the Colts and the Saints is the culmination of an entire season spent glued to the TV set, ingesting Buffalo wings and ignoring the general quality of my life. It's the end of a very long road, and only one team will be left standing. I'm getting emotional already.

But there's another reason I love the Super Bowl so much: I am positively, irrevocably addicted to gambling. Well, some people might call it an addiction … I prefer the term "a zesty, cash-based extracurricular activity." And there's no game that makes gambling as fun as the Super Bowl. Not only can you make traditional bets (who will win, over/under on the total points, etc.) but you can spice things up a bit with so-called "prop bets," those zany, near-suicidal wagers on a series of largely unpredictable events. It's like gambling times 10. It makes the game more, uh, fun. Seriously, you've never watched the opening coin flip as intently as you do when you've got $100 riding on "First Team To Commit A Penalty."

Anyway, I figured "Why let the oddsmakers have all the fun?" So, in anticipation of the big game, I've drawn up my own series of prop bets, ones that draw heavily from the world of music and popular culture. Why not, right? I can stop any time I want.

On to the odds!

» Person Super Bowl MVP Will Thank First: God [4/7], Teammates [5/9], Agent [2/1], Miley Cyrus [100/1].

» Odds Kanye West Will Interrupt Super Bowl MVP's Speech With "Imma Let You Finish …" Rant That Big Ups Saints' TE Darnell Dinkins: [75/1].
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