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Today marks the four year anniversary of "American Idol in 60 Seconds." Deep breath.

To celebrate, we've re-posted the first "Idol in 60 Seconds" I ever produced. (In 2008, most of my early recaps were taken down thanks to a change in our video encoding process.) It's funny to think that only a few hundred people saw this four years ago when it premiered.

As you can see, not much has changed in the snark-a-second formula. Hell, I'm still sitting at the same cluttered desk. (Seriously, MTV? Will you ever give me an actual office?)

The rest is history, as they say. By my count, I've done 101 more "60 Second" entries since, summarizing everything from roject Runway" to "TRL," from Al Gore's "Live Earth" concerts to actual elections, from Paula Abdul's gonzo Bravo reality show to Kelly Clarkson's "My December" drama.

The recap segment has been praised by "Idol" winners, Bravo’s Andy Cohen and respected bloggers, whose work I practically worship. Wow.

And here's where I get even more sentimental.

Special thanks to MTV News' old editorial director Rob Mancini for having the initial "You should do a TV version of your 'Idol' recaps" idea. His direction — "Make'em a minute and tell me everything I need to know" — inspired everything.

Shout-out to then-executive producer Jim Fraenkel and Ryan Kroft for suggesting I host the recaps myself, even though I had no intention of being a TV personality.

Much love to MTV News bigwigs present and past, Dave Sirulnick and Ocean MacAdams, for suggesting we add a countdown clock to the proceedings.

Continued hugs to current senior Vice President Benjamin Wagner for letting me crank these out, even though the time and energy needed to produce them prevents me from being in the office during normal business hours.

I owe a lot to Wen-Ting Yang who edited the first segment with me. (Her sped-up footage, hyper-fast clip editing and freeze-frame "ding" at the end set the tone perfectly.) And I couldn't mention "Idol in 60 Seconds" without Joe DeShano, my old overnight editor who really helped shape the recaps even more.

My work wouldn't be seen without the tireless work of the entire MTV News department, from the digital producers to the PAs to the reporters who often write articles to support my videos.

In a serendipitous twist of fate, a freelancer named Brendan Kennedy taped the first recap with me. Little did I know that this day-player shooter, who I barely knew, would eventually be my professional soulmate. His creativity and support on our countless projects together ("MTV Detox," may you rest in peace) gave me the on-screen confidence to take my "Idol in 60 Seconds" recaps to insane new places (like my Gokey dance and bird flu recaps).

Most of all, I want to thank all of you who watched, re-watched, forwarded, tweeted, commented on and followed my "Idol in 60 Seconds" recaps through the years. I wouldn't be anywhere without your loyal clicks.

Tags American Idol, video

Wednesday night's (March 23) "American Idol" was Motown themed because nothing says "contemporary artist" like songs that were written half a century ago. That didn't prevent the stars from showing up in droves. Look! There's Jennifer Beals and Liv Tyler! Is that Kirsten Dunst having a gal's night out in the studio audience? And golly! Adam Shankman looks just divine in sweatpants!

The tension was extra-thick Wednesday, and not just because the audience clearly loves Steven Tyler a million times more than Jennifer Lopez. (Awkward!) You see, the top 11 were competing for 10 spots on this summer's "Idol" tour, which is not only a big money maker for the contestants but also an opportunity to be in close contact with stalkers from coast to coast.

Seacrest giddily pointed out that this was the first time Randy Jackson made it through a telecast without using the word "pitchy" but he failed to congratulate Tom Petty for no longer being the most decayed-looking American rocker alive. That distinction now goes to Aerosmith guitarist Brad Whitford, who was also spotted in the audience. Golf claps! (Anything louder and he'll be spooked back into his hole.)

Before I go on a rant about how you need to tune into my new weekly show "Idol Party Live," airing Thursdays at 9 p.m. on MTV.com, let's get to Wednesday's (mostly solid) performances!

Casey Abrams
Song: Marvin Gaye's "I Heard It Through the Grapevine"
Verdict: I Heard It On The Subway
Team Iovine tried its best to reign in Casey's "screechy scream." Team Hair Stylists tried its best to reign in Casey's curls with hair gel. And I tried my best to reign in my Negative Nancy side so I might finally enjoy Casey Abrams' vocals again. Everyone failed. I love Casey Abrams as a TV character. He can whip the crowd into a frenzy with a simple demon face and mere proximity (except for Gordon Ramsey who refused to clap and some goddess in a leather jacket who didn't even acknowledge the growling hippie walking past her).

J. Lo squeed, "You're so specific as to who you are. Is there anybody like you right there?" Truth, Ms. Lopez, but there's also nobody like the homeless lady on the A train who sings her original drum-and-vocal composition, "Gotta Eat! (This Ain't No Joke, For Real I'm Broke)" — do you want to give her a million dollar record contract too? More importantly, what's the phone number to vote for Casey's adorable gal pal Megan? More of her, please!

Thia Megia
Song: Martha and the Vandellas' "Heat Wave"
Verdict: Cold Front
Motown launched the successful careers of kid stars like Michael Jackson and Stevie Wonder. So how frustrating is it that Jennifer Lopez gave Thia Megia's stiff stage presence a pass on Motown night because she's "only 15, I mean 16, I mean 15, I mean, how old are you again?" I'll give Megia a little credit for attempting something other than an end credits movie ballad, but I'll be damned if there's anyone on out there that believe this girl’s ever felt a burning sensation anywhere, other than that one time she had chicken pox two weeks ago. (She's young, y'all!) After her performance, Thia let America in on a dirty little secret: "I flubbed the lyrics a little bit but hopefully nobody noticed." You mean, the lyrics of "Heat Wave" aren't "[stop singing, turn nervously to the band leader, mumble]?" You learn something new every day!

Jacob Lusk
Song: Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell's "You're All I Need To Get By"
Verdict: Holy S---!
I've been saying for weeks that Jacob Lusk was this year's Jennifer Hudson. Read More...

Tags American Idol, video

The songs have been selected. The cheap leftover prom dresses? Chosen. The new director has pre-loaded all of his favorite wilderness graphics. This is "American Idol X: When Teenage Girls Find Out They're Not God's Gift To Music."

The theme for Wednesday night's (March 9) Top 13 show: "Personal Idols." They included a man who was tried (and acquitted) for peeing on a 13-year-old, a famous adulterer and a dude who once uploaded eight free albums from kooky alter egos with song titles as varied as "Get Scared, Throw Up, Die," "Drunk as a Pile of F---" and "Passed Out In AA – F---." Perhaps producers should have added the word "musical" in the theme's title, because I seriously doubt Thia Megia's manufacturers programmed her to adopt a chimp and hang out with Webster.

Before I go on a rant about how five out of the 13 contestants chose songs that were covered on season nine's dreary stage, let's get to the performances. And as an added bonus, my mother-in-law is staying at Casa Cantiello this week, so prepare yourself for some guest commentary from an admittedly tone-deaf non-"Idol" fan.

Lauren Alaina
Song: Shania Twain's "Any Man of Mine"
Verdict: Shania Plain
In the studio, Golden Child Lauren Alaina hooked up with Jimmy Iovine's buddy Don Was. (I say "hook up" in the professional sense. I'm not implying Lauren Alaina sleeps around for career opportunities — that's what a good stage mom is for!) Shania's foot-stomper is a song that "Idol" fans have seen performed by a 900 pound diva and a Mohawked zombie. Was and Alaina went the straight-forward route with the song and the result was a lot like a bowl of Cookie Crisp that has been festering in your sink for a week: Sugary sweet and vaguely resembling what you remember enjoying, but with a thick layer of "ick" clouding the goods.

In what will be a long ride on "Idol" for Alaina, this performance will be noteworthy only in how she reacted when the judges didn't bow down to her and proclaim her the perfect jewel of music she believes she is. "I just didn't wanna do a ballad 'cause that's what everybody does," she pouted, having flashbacks to that time she was this close to being crowned Georgia Toddler USA 2004. Meanwhile, all mother-in-law could muster was, "She wore that?!"

Casey Abrams
Song: The Beatles' "With A Little Help From My Friends" (via Joe Cocker)
Verdict: Half-Cocked
Casey Abrams sang about getting high with his friends and I totally believed him, man. In fact, Abrams' appeal as a performer is all about the conviction. When it comes to vocal chops? Martin Short's old "SNL" synchronized swimmer sketch comes to mind. "I'm not ... a strong swimmer." At this point, the fact that Casey botched a lyric or two and missed high notes like he misses shaving is completely irrelevant. Steven Tyler called PastyLegs a "rainbow of talent, a plethora of passion." As long as producers keep giving him backup choruses to support, I'll be Team PastyLegs to the end.
Read More...

Tags American Idol, video

Wednesday night (March 2) was Ladies Night on "American Idol." Half-priced appletinis! Your friends get in for free! DJ Suave will be spinning the jams he thinks you love all night long! Casey Abrams' facial hair will not — I repeat not — be allowed entry!

In actuality, the Top 12 girls show meant half-hearted versions of previous "Idol" stars' breakthrough singles, half-successful up-dos and a few stealth performers who have been laying in the background waiting for the first opportunity for their competition to attack.

(Speaking of waiting to strike, it's about time my own "Idol" show emerged from the bushes to devour the Internet. "Idol Party Live" premieres this Thursday night (March 3) at 10 p.m. Eastern on MTV.com. My co-host will be Entertainment Weekly's hilarious Annie Barrett, and our guest will be Liz Lee, star of the hit MTV show "My Life As Liz." Come hang with us!)

Before I start an online Facebook petition called "Naima Adedapo Needs To Be On 'Project Runway' ASAP Plz," let's check out the Top 12 girls' performances.

Ta-Tynisa Wilson
Song: Rihanna's "Only Girl (In the World)"
Verdict: S.O.S.
Ladies and gentleman, let's give a round of applause to Ta-Tynisa Wilson, our sacrificial lamb of season 10. A Beyoncé impersonator stomping through a Rihanna song? Stop it. I could practically hear Nigel Lythgoe in rehearsals: "Make it bigger, Ta-Tynisa. At the end, why you don't just start shrieking for no reason? Yeah, the judges will love that ... and my precious Lauren Alaina will be one step closer to ruling the world. Mwuhaha!"

Yet somehow the newbie judges defended her when Randy Jackson called her out for being sharper than a fine Cabot cheddar. "Being a good performer is about moving the crowd, and she moved the crowd," sassed J. Lo. And in that one sentence, Ms. Lopez encapsulated her entire career. Her internal monologue added, "Shoot, if we're gonna judge signing voices up in this joint, they hired the wrong Fly Girl."

Naima Adedapo
Song: George Gershwin's "Summertime"
Verdict: Back to the Toilets
Naima chose "Summertime" because it was one of the first songs her mom taught her. A sweet gesture, but what Mama Adedapo should have taught her daughter was Idol 101 instead: You. Don't. Touch. "Summertime." Read More...

Tags American Idol, video