I envy you ... the unwashed masses, the blissfully unemployed, the bearded and bedraggled. You get to go to Bonnaroo, to revel in four days of unadulterated muck and music and mind-altering substances. I don't, because I am stuck in meetings all week.

And this is most certainly a bummer. See, I love Bonnaroo. I think it's the best fest in America, an experience every music fan must have at least once in their lives (and I'm not just saying this because, back in 2007, I got to fly a helicopter there).

But this year, because of the time constraints due to back-to-back-to-back business meetings (read: impending adulthood), I'm not going to make it down to Manchester, Tennessee. I will probably regret this for the rest of my life, because Bonnaroo 2009 looks like it's going to be a blast.

And, yeah, I know that the weather forecast for Manchester could charitably be described as "cataclysmic" — the phrase "strong storms" is bandied about, which should make camping in an open field with 80,000 other revelers a rather messy affair — but that doesn't change the fact that there are tons of can't-miss moments spread out over the fest's four days. Which means that if you're brave enough to, uh, brave the weather, you're gonna be in for a treat.

So even though I won't be down in Tennessee with you, I figured I could still lend a hand. I've thrown together a Bonnaroo Cheat Sheet, highlighting some of the fest's best acts. These are the bands you probably can't afford to miss, even if you have to trudge through six feet of water to check them out.

» Thursday: A bit of a light schedule, as most of the 80k will still be setting up their tents, but you'd be doing yourself a favor if you checked out Passion Pit, a much-buzzed electro-pop outfit from Massachusetts who just released their debut disc, a dazzler called Manners. If you can get past frontman Michael Angelakos' pinched squeal, there's plenty of goodness.

» Friday: And here we go. A packed day ... you can't miss early with Animal Collective or the ethereal St. Vincent, but it's a bummer that the schedule-makers deemed it necessary to pit the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Grizzly Bear and Santigold against one another. And don't even get me started about having to choose between Al Green, TV on the Radio and Amadou & Miriam. Oh, and there's also evening sets from the Beastie Boys and David Byrne, a headlining performance (three hours!) from Phish, and late-night, super-party slots for Phoenix, Crystal Castles and Girl Talk. If you can't already tell, I am jealous.

» Saturday: Things start early (like noon) with sets by the heavily buzzed-about Chairlift and shambling, rambling Elvis Perkins. The early afternoon features the kick-ass Heartless Bastards, the beatific Bon Iver and the smooove Raphael Saadiq. In the evening, why not check out Jenny Lewis, Wilco, the Decemberists, the Mars Volta or Elvis FREAKING Costello? The headliner is Bruuuuuce and the late-nighters are Nine Inch Nails, Yeasayer and MGMT. I also think that this is the night of the annual Bonnaroo SuperJam. You cannot lose.

» Sunday: Shake off your hangover, or have the Dillinger Escape Plan blast it out of your head for you. Really, there's a full day of great metal (and whatever the heck you consider Coheed and Cambria) at the "That Tent," so you can't miss there at all. Erykah Badu is a definite must-see, as is Neko Case. Oh, and just in case you missed Phish the first time out, they're closing the fest out with a three-and-a-half-hour set.

The best four hours of live music I've ever experienced took place at the Coachella festival in 2004. It was a Pixies/ Radiohead/ Kraftwerk/ TV on the Radio back-to-back-to-back-to-back string of sets that only Coachella or a European festival could have offered. The Empire Polo fields in the California desert have been sacred ground for U.S. music festivals ever since Coachella's inception in the fall of 1999, and that spring afternoon in 2004 — my fifth time at the festival — was so epic, I have yet to return.

My day started much earlier than the Pixies' set but that's what I remember kicking off my "Afternoon Not to Be Forgotten." The Pixies' reunion tour had started about two weeks earlier, and I had already seen them three times, having flown myself to Minnesota to catch their first reunion show. (Yes, I know I have a raging battle with the concept of moderation.) I needed to see them with 40,000 people, and it was wonderful. Not a bad appetizer for Radiohead, who took the stage just as the last bits of purple sunset were ducking out of site in the desert sky. They made a majestic offering to the gods. They're one of the best live bands in existence right now and, fan or not, they're worth seeing. I suspect that is why they're performing on the Grammys, to give those who have never seen them a little taste.

This is where the experience gets uniquely Coachella. We left Radiohead's set after about an hour because my electronic automaton heroes, Kraftwerk, were playing in a tent a few hundred yards away. There's something incredibly illicit-feeling about having a dance party inside a tent in the middle of the California desert. I'm not a hippie, but I imagine this is why some people are. That Kraftwerk set marked what was supposed to be the end of the night, except that word had traveled that TV on the Radio were playing an on-grounds afterparty for Urb magazine that we talked our ways into. It was nice to see some familiar faces out in the desert, some New York faces, introducing themselves and their music to the Cali heads. Their hour-long set sort of crept up on people, from the tuning of instruments and migrating into what I think was their first song, "Young Liars." By the time they were done, it was 1:30 a.m. and we were off into the desert night to cause mischief.

There's been a lot of chatter here in the office and with friends online about how the Coachella lineup this year isn't that amazing. Paul McCartney, the Killers, the Cure, Amy Winehouse, etc. Sometimes we live in insular bubbles, and hearing the names of bands that come through New York all the time doesn’t really pack a punch. But that's not what has made my past Coachella experiences memorable. For me, Coachella is about the unexpected. It's about trapezing from one stage to another, rushing to see Sigur Ros play to an afternoon crowd in one tent and then rushing off to dance to Underworld a few minutes later. It's about sampling the dozens of bands those of you who don't live in New York or L.A. or Chicago or San Francisco haven't seen yet.

And it's also about the desert. It's about absorbing the heat and running into old friends and making a stop at Joshua Tree on Friday morning and partying long into the night at some band's golf-course villa on Saturday night. It's about dipping into the pool on Sunday morning and seeing some of your favorite bands in a place that just seems a bit unreal.

And because of 2004, I'll probably never go again ...

The announcements for 2009's music-festival season are fast approaching, and rumors are flying all over about who's playing where.

Through some smart Net sleuthing (on artists' MySpaces, etc.), many artists' festival appearances have already been identified. LAist.com, for example, has determined that the Killers, No Age, Girl Talk, Hold Steady and Fleet Foxes will be at Coachella.

But what about the more outlandish rumors? The juiciest one for Coachella is clearly Britney Spears. Many speculated earlier this week that it's well within the realm of possibility for the pop star to drop by the fest (as Madonna did in 2006). She just happens to be performing in Los Angeles that same weekend, and the Coachella grounds in Indio are just a few short hours' drive away.

There's also speculation that the Coachella headlining slot will be Blur's first reunion show. They're already confirmed to be reuniting for a one-off show in the U.K. in the summer, but is an earlier debut in California in the cards?

Then there's Bonnaroo. We've already reported the widespread rumors that legendary jam-band Phish are headlining the Tennessee fest, but over the last week talk has also intensified over at the Inforoo message board suggesting that Bruce Springsteen is set to take the What stage. The only other name to be "confirmed" indirectly thus far for the Roo is Erykah Badu (via her friend Rceezy's MySpace).

Today also marks the beginning of this year's Roo Clues, a series of riddles appearing on Bonnaroo Radio that hint at confirmed performers. You can keep up-to-date on all the Roo Clues over the next few weeks at this handy site set up by an Inforoo member. But if you don't feel that ambitious, just stay tuned to MTVNews.com. You can be sure that we'll have the full lineups for all of this year's major fests as they're announced.

By Alex Shapiro

Are Phish headlining Bonnaroo? There's been no official announcement yet, but rumors have been swirling for weeks. And with details about the band's reunion tour showing up on Billboard.com today, the possibility of Phish taking over Manchester, Tennessee, for the rumored two-night stand is looking more and more likely. As I take a gander at their relatively short list of dates, there seems to be a very curious week-long break in between gigs in North Carolina and Missouri — hey, Tennessee is even located between those two states — smack dab in the middle of the tour. Now you might say, "Well, these guys are a little older now and they might need a break. They haven't done this in five years!" To that I say, "Shenanigans!"

I'd be willing to bet my limited-edition Phish bobble-head dolls that this "break" will indeed actually be the band's headlining spot at Bonnaroo. First off, Red Light Management, who helped establish the festival, is also Phish's new management company. Think about it: They have one of the biggest touring acts in the country as clients (Phish) and they are co-founders of one of the biggest festivals in the country (Bonnaroo). Do the math!

Additionally, in a recent interview with Burlington Free Press, bassist Mike Gordon opened up about the band's future. "Now it's like, maybe we don't have to have our own festival to make great music. We don't have to do that, and maybe we can be even more a part of the music industry than we were before rather than separate from it."

So while it hasn't been officially announced (and won't be until February 3, when the initial lineup is released), it's looking very much like Phish's next festival will be named "Bonnaroo."

Amongst bustle skirts and corsets, top hats and tails, brass-rimmed goggles and time-traveling arm bands, it was me, in a black tank top and jeans, that received the most stares in Brooklyn a few weeks ago. I was at the first day of the Dances of Vice festival, an evening that also served as my first taste of Steampunk, a wide-reaching subculture that lately has been, well, picking up steam. Yet people are still hard-pressed to define what is, on the surface, an embrace of the neo-Victorian, but deeper than that, a keenly felt reaction to the stark modernity that has come to homogenize a generation with iPods and Ikea.

Over the course of shooting two separate Steampunk events — Dances of Vice, which spanned both Brooklyn and Manhattan; and SalonCon, a two-day event held in Somerset, NJ — I was exposed to a mix of concerts, fashion shows and lectures. Vendors sold handmade corsets, jewelry made from clock gears and even wings. People's imaginations were on full display in their clothing and accoutrement. I expected to simply observe from a distance, but the more I learned, the more the Steampunk artists and their philosophy began to appeal to me. Musicians I knew and liked were mentioned, such as Tom Waits, Smashing Pumpkins, the Decemberists and even Sufjan Stevens; "Edward Scissorhands," "The Prestige" and "Wild Wild West" were a small handful of the "steamy" movies that I had seen.

I sat in on an interview with Voltaire — a regular on the Steampunk festival circuit — as he broke Steampunk music down into something that, while using classical instruments, can be anything, and is just sort of "old-time" and "anachronistic." I began to realize that between the costumery, the music and the movies, Steampunk is really about stepping away from our everyday lives and having a good time. And I can get behind that, even though I may not wear a corset anytime soon.

Yo La Tengo, Titus Andronicus and Ebony Bones performed a bittersweet send-off Sunday for the final JellyNYC Pool Party held at Williamsburg's McCarren Park Pool.

But fear not, outdoor concert lovers — JellyNYC plans to work with local officials and community advocacy groups to find a new mainstay venue in the area by next summer.

Ebony Bones found some shelter with us from the sweltering heat and shared her thoughts on the last pool party right before her set. We were having so much fun we missed her signal to get onstage, which resulted in Ebony making a mad dash for her own show!

Check out what Ebony had to say and some of her set after the jump.

We covered the JellyNYC concert series all summer long, so if you missed this last free show (and can't afford to fly to the U.K. to see Ebony Bones on tour), come reminisce with us and watch interviews and performance clips right here in our pool-party show.

But I began my day by speaking with one of my favorites, the Collective. A few hours before they brought their clanging, charging, joyful noise to the masses, we talked on the VIP bleachers overlooking the grounds. How great is the idea of Kings or Radiohead fans discovering Animal Collective? "That's the main reason, I think, you do festivals," said Weitz. The guys are not doing a lot of fests this summer — they're concentrating on mixing and finishing their ninth album, due out in January — but they were pleased to be at All Points West, in part because they were playing the main stage. While there is no doubt AC's sound is big enough to fill a large setting, Noah Lennox, a.k.a. Panda Bear, is not a big fan of outdoor fests. Apparently, he and the sun "don't agree."

The brothers Followill — the Kings of Leon — are one of America's great, real rock-and-roll bands. But they are still underappreciated in this country, at least compared to their rabid European following. They've got a brand-new album, Only by the Night, ready for release in September, and a tour to go along with it, but this was their only U.S. festival date of the summer. When I caught up with them in the artists' compound, they were duly pumped to be back playing in their homeland, at New York's first big rock festival in a long time. They liked the fact that All Points West was a more manageable size than, say Coachella. They kind of liked its slightly "disorganized" feel, and regarding the fest's very restrictive beer policy drummer Nathan Followill, Corona in hand, declared, "They have no alcohol here, and since I stopped drinking, I like that." Um, you stopped drinking? Yeah, he said, "right after this beer."

Environmental issues were a big topic of our conversations with bands. All Points West highly touts its green initiatives, like promoting public transportation and recycling and reducing waste. Most artists seem to be all for it — in theory, if not necessarily in practice. The Kings told me they're not at a level at which they can really afford Radiohead-like commissions of carbon footprint studies or conversion to biodiesel tour buses — although they joked, "We want to have a bus that runs on alcohol and urine. It's the gift that keeps on giving."

Hey, we all make sacrifices. Like Donald Cumming, singer with New York pop-rockers the Virgins, who said he "just stopped showering, to save water." And then there was the time that he lived without electricity because he didn't pay his bill. "But I like to think I was doing my part for the planet."

The Virgins won some new fans during their APW performance.. I had more than one person ask me, "Who are these guys? They're cool!" Among those who didn't need to be converted was Jessica Szohr, Vanessa on "Gossip Girl," who told us backstage that she was there mainly to see the Virgins, "and, of course, Radiohead." Also spotted backstage was Gregg "Girl Talk" Gillis, who had performed at APW on Friday but came back on Saturday just to enjoy himself. He told me that between APW and his mobbed, completely bananas set at last weekend's Lollapalooza, it was a "pretty great" time for him.

Likewise, it's a great time for Canadian electro-pop-funk duo Chromeo, whose Dave 1 said he's gotten more into recycling recently. "It's the least I could do, since I recycle enough music already," he cracked. As for Chromeo's P-Thugg, he said he was psyched to be playing APW, just because he was told that Daryl Hall and John Oates played the same park many years ago. They're huge fans of the '80s pop-soul duo, and since an A-Ha homage worked so well for them with their "Momma's Boy" video, they said maybe next they'll try their hand at a Hall and Oates-inspired clip.

Finally, if Chromeo provided laughs, the ever-fearless Roots provided the day's conscience. ?uestlove wasted no time laying into the Bush administration when we spoke. "Any environmental effort is a good thing, considering the example being set by the people in charge," he said. Defending Obama's alleged flip-flop on offshore drilling, the drummer offered, "He only said he would be willing to consider whether there were more responsible ways of doing it. I want a leader who is willing to look at the facts and weigh both sides of something." Which is not to say ?uestlove doesn't lighten up. He joked about the "dry" policy of All Points West, causing his friends to make a run on the vodka supply in his trailer. He was less than thrilled about playing in the "death slot" — playing the second stage right before the day's much-revered headliners — and compared their situation to a bathroom predicament.

Quite a day at Liberty State Park on Saturday, and if it was any indication of how the rest of the weekend went, the inaugural All Points West was a success. Unless of course, you wanted to have a beer while watching a band.

Kings of Leon are the sort of dependable rock band that almost effortlessly delivers a good show — and while a colleague of mine thought they could have used a little more effort in Saturday's set, I thought they delivered solid renditions of fuzzed-out, whiskey-soaked songs that just do not get old: "Taper Jean Girl," "The Bucket" and "On Call" and definitely got the late-afternoon crowd going. Every time I see the Kings live I'm reminded of just how many great hooks and melodies these guys they've crammed into three albums — which makes it all the more amazing they're bigger in this country (they're massive in England). On Saturday, we were also treated to "Sex on Fire" — the first single (and one of the more hard-charging songs) from Only By the Night, the band's fourth LP, set for release September 23.

If straight ahead rawk is your cup of tea — or your shot of something stronger — then you might have felt like someone spiked your drink when Animal Collective took the stage earlier in the day. The New York quartet (which is touring as a trio these days, with band member Deakin on leave) manages to create some of the most noisy-yet-beautiful, dissonant-yet-hummable, and totally captivating music around. The told me earlier in the day they are not big on outdoor, daytime sets — but they managed to bring it in a performance that included the primal "Peacebone," the jubilant "Fireworks" and Panda Bear's hypnotic solo track "Comfy in Nautica." If anything, it felt even more experimental than their headlining set last month at Chicago's Pitchfork fest (a set that was cut short by a curfew law), or maybe it was just the context. There is something inspiring about Radiohead fans, who came early to get near the front, getting an up-close look and listen to a band that drastically pushes musical boundaries.

We'll have more on both Animal Collective and Kings of Leon in the coming days on mtvnews.com.

Oh, I don't know. How about, enjoying a beer while watching the concert? Here's the deal: You arrive at APW and soon discover that in order to drink, you must get your ID checked, then pass into a closed-off, fenced-in area — from which you cannot see the stage — to pay $7 for a Bud or Bud Light. You get a yellow plastic bracelet on which there are five tabs, one for each beer you are allowed. Each time you order, a tab is removed. And to indicate that you have been issued a bracelet (they're one step ahead of you, these beer police) they put a big Sharpie "X" on your hand.

Excuse me? I don’t recall that being mentioned when I read about All Points West and bought my ticket. OK, I didn’t buy a ticket. And thank God for that. I can’t imagine how I would have felt if I had paid 89 bucks for the privilege of spending seven on a beer in a quarantined area and downing it as quickly as possible so I could get back to seeing bands.

Actually, I can imagine it because I saw it in the faces of the pissed-off people in line for the beer gulag, which averaged about 100 people in the bottleneck from 4 p.m. on. One even yelled at me, "John Norris, what's with this f---ed-up beer policy?" I wish I had an answer.

The artists, as is the case in almost everything, were exempt. The beer flowed freely backstage. But when I was walking across the field with a singer from one of the bands on the bill, who dared to bring a can out into the open, a Jersey park police officer walked up to us and yelled, "Drop it!" When the singer attempted to chug said Bud, the brown shirt grabbed the can and ordered me to open my bag.

When I asked the festival publicist about this policy, she said “Lots of festivals are doing beer gardens" — although I’ve been to three in the past month, and this is the only one where I couldn’t have a beer and watch a band at the same time. Subsequent inquiries yielded the following explanation: “It’s a Jersey state park, so it’s dry. They went through hell just getting permission to have beer gardens here.” Yeah? Then publicize it. Everyone connected with this festival — Goldenvoice, AEG, Liberty Event — should have made it clear just what the deal was before concertgoers bought tickets. The Web site merely said that concertgoers couldn't bring alcohol with them, but that "Beer will be available to all patrons of legal age for purchase at the festival. Please bring one or two government ID's showing proof of age over 21 if you plan to purchase beer."

I do hope that All Points West returns for a second year in 2009. But I hope even more that this policy is changed, or the concert is moved to a less restrictive location.

What do you think? Should APW’s promoters have publicized this policy beforehand?

(Editors' note: MTV News asked Bang Camaro to help us cover Lollapalooza and they were happy to oblige! The band's Bryn Bennett wrote this blog; Alex Necochea shot the video.)

"Load-in is at 8:15am?!" This is terrible news for a rock band. We travel around the country in stinky vans, make no money and don't take showers for many reasons. One of them is so that we don't have to wake up at 7 a.m. like the rest of corporate America. It was Lollapalooza though, and Radiohead was going to be sound-checking at the same time, so I guess this early wakeup was worth it.

We pulled into Chicago from Boston at about 1 a.m. on Friday, had a few cans of beer and some of us did our best to fall asleep. Others of us attack life with the same vigor as a cat attacks a mouse, sometimes with the same bloody results.

(Watch Bang Camaro "interview" the Black Lips, plus get medieval after the jump!)

We were at Grant Park by 8:20 a.m. (not bad for us!) and then, as per usual, sat around in the van for about an hour. No matter when you're supposed to be at a show, you end up sitting around forever. This time was a little different, though. We usually are sitting in the smelly backstage area of a club, but this time we were waiting in the van, surrounded by celebrities' busses. It made us a little angry that we had 15 guys in a van while all the other bands had just three or four people in monster busses, but whatever. We probably had wittier banter.

We finally made it in, and soundcheck went as usual. It was intimidating how large the field was in front of us. We were the first band to play. Would anyone be there? The answer: YES! At about 11:20 (we were going on at 11:30), the doors opened to the thundering sounds of the "Star Wars" theme. Tons of people came running in ... straight past the MySpace stage (where we were about to play) and toward the AT&T stage, where Radiohead was going to play. That was a little disheartening, but then some people starting running to our stage. Some guy with a "Rock Band" T-shirt and a "Rock Band" guitar in his backpack took the center spot. By the time we went on, a pretty large crowd had formed.

As our set went on, people started packing up to watch us. I guess a 22-man hard-rock act is a little tough to ignore. By the time we hit our last song, "Push Push (Lady Lightning)," there was a sea of people with their hands in the air, clapping along. Alex kept yelling, "Is this really happening?!" I don't think he was talking to me, but I answered him with a guitar solo. That ruled.

Then, it was all over. We did about five hours of interviews, throughout which I probably said some of the dumbest things ever recorded on video. MTV gave us a flipcam, those most of the videos we shot, besides the clips above, will probably never see the light of day. (I apologize to anyone I was bugging — except the security guy who wouldn't let me return the camera.) It was an amazing day. Thanks to everyone who came out to watch us that early. We really appreciate it.

Oh, yeah ... and I ate dinner next to Elijah Wood.