Alicia KeysLike a velvet painting of Jesus playing cards with Elvis, Bob Marley and Jim Morrison, somewhere out there, we hope, is a poker game in a smoke-filled basement featuring all the male "American Idol" ghosts of major-label-glory past.

Maybe Ruben Studdard is dealing, Taylor Hicks is mixing up some beer-tinis, Bo Bice is playing a bit of Skynyrd on an acoustic guitar in the corner, and the newest recruit to the Hall of "AI" Shame, Blake Lewis, is quietly beatboxing "You Give Love a Bad Name" while drowning his sorrows in a bowl of Funyuns.

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