Anne Hathaway

By Kara Warner

Inspired in large part by actress Anne Hathaway's Lil Wayne-style rant rap that she performed for Conan O'Brien, we got to thinking about all the other famous faces we've heard rap in public and/or via YouTube whose vocal talents "shine better elsewhere," so to speak.

In no particular order, here are five individuals whose lyrical stylings, while at times courageous, unique and sometimes really cute, shouldn't be repeated. With ONE surprise exception.

Joaquin Phoenix
Who can forget the actor-turned-rapper-turned-trickster's hoax during which he had some folks convinced he was giving up acting in order to become a legit rap artist? It was all very confusing, even when he announced that his year of extraordinary eccentric behavior was part of filming the mockumentary, "I'm Still Here." Of all those on this list, Phoenix's attempts at rapping were the most unsettling.

Britney Spears
When you think of Ms. Spears, there are visions of squeaky-clean, bubble-gum humble beginnings on Disney's "Mickey Mouse Club." Or the still-innocent-but-semi-scandalous Catholic school girl outfit she sported in the video for "Baby One More Time." Both interesting and excellent moments for a pop star - not a rapper. The evidence: Spears' impromptu ill-suited attempt filmed during an early episode of MTV's "Punk'd" with Ashton Kutcher (Hint: it's at the 4-minute mark). Read More...

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Photo by Gil Kaufman

Photo by Gil Kaufman

Cincinnati -- Talk about the perfect bill on the perfect night. Kid Rock and old pal Sheryl Crow kicked off their summer tour on Saturday (July 2) in the Queen City with a three-hour marathon of Americana that had it all – fireworks, giant American flags, songs about lazy (mostly drunken) summer days and pontoon boats, multiple references to funny cigarettes, purple mountains majesty and, of course, a couple of Uncle Sam-loving strippers thrown in for good measure.

What better way is there to gear up for the 4th of July, right?

For the 15,500 at Riverbend Amphitheater, clearly there was nowhere else to be in the windup to patriotic weekend, despite oppressive heat and humidity that made goopy mascara run, sky-high hair droop and sweat to flow in torrents down a sea of butterfly-themed tramp stamps.

Swaggering out from underneath a titanic set of bull horns with glowing red eyes, a red-white and blue-decked Rock banged out "American Bad Ass" and "God Bless Saturday" in front of a rustic set that looked like a woodsy saloon in his native northern Michigan, complete with a stuffed bear wearing a dookie chain and a full-service, two-story bar with beer taps and bottles of Jim Beam lined up across the front. With a 10-piece band backing him, the rapper-turned-Bob-Segeresque heartland rocker quickly reminded fans of his roots with the Run-DMC-like "You Never Met a Motherf---er Quite Like Me," which got him so riled up he needed to take a minute to brush his hair and change hats before continuing the assault with "Cowboy."

Now, I've been going to shows for a long time now and while I can't recall ever seeing a stripper pole on stage, I've now seen a total of four over the past week at two different shows. So I was not surprised when a pair of poles popped up out of the floor and two exotic dancers materialized to shimmy as Rock put on a cowboy hat (a white one, if you can believe it) and told his tale of West Coast pimpin while flanked by two giant American flags.
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Joaquin Phoenix

While debate continues to rage about the validity of actor Joaquin Phoenix's rap career — is he keeping it real or simply fronting? (I am extremely white, BTW) — there's one dude out there who refuses to believe this is anything less than legit ... so much so that he's actively looking to work with Phoenix.

His name is Dan Suh, the former tour manager for Fall Out Boy who now earns a living as a jet-setting superstar DJ. Fans of FOB might recognize him as "Korean Tom Cruise," a handle Pete Wentz stuck him with a few years back. And he would like very much to be Joaquin Phoenix's DJ.
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