There's this condition called PTRSD. Don't worry — it's nothing serious. And while the numbers are growing, only a small percentage of the population is affected. It develops in the days and months (in some cases, years) after any or all of the following experiences:

1. Having zero control over your minutes, hours and days, and taking orders from people you cannot see (perhaps via telephone or message)

2. Being lied to on a regular basis in order to prevent your "passing knowledge" to those outside of "the circle" 

3. Having zero access to the outside world and not being able to relate to those in said outside world 

4. Being sequestered and isolated for weeks or even months at a time, sometimes completely by yourself, with no phone or computer

5. Having no concept of time, including when you might be leaving 

6. Having someone, well, always listening

Rumored victims of this disorder include Christian Siriano, Omarosa, Puck, Santino and, well, me.

Yes, Post-Traumatic Reality-Show Disorder is a state of confusion, complete with flashbacks and the feeling that someone is always watching you. Another sign of PTRSD is a sort of itchy, raw sensation on one's back from the stretchy and uncomfortable belt that a microphone pack might be attached to. The list goes on.

About three months after filming "America's Next Top Model," I experienced these symptoms. I spoke to my fellow contestants, and as I suspected, they experienced them as well. My heart would beat faster when telling a secret for fear that a camera crew would soon be part of my audience. I felt naked without my microphone belt, and I woke up waiting for someone to tell me when to eat and where to go. I wondered if it was OK to walk outside. Not to mention feeling blind when the lights were off (we slept most nights with the lights on — hey, it was a set, after all).

So when I stepped onto another set, the "Real World: Brooklyn" house, a surge of anxiety came over me. Three years later, and I was having a relapse of PTRSD. It wasn't too bad, and I'm pretty sure I masked it so that neither Chet nor the cameras could tell. But for the first time, I felt like I was back in the "Top Model" house (which, by the way, I think was a lot radder than the "RW" house). I had my microphone pack strapped on and cameras following me with every step, and an alarm would ring every time I spoke about production — that of "The Real World" or "ANTM"! (Um, did the "ANTM" producers call "The Real World" producers? Are they still filming me every day? What's going on? Anxiety!)

I'll leave the profiles of the house dwellers to the other publications that have already written about them extensively. And despite all that I've said, I'm extremely grateful and excited to have been on "ANTM" — it was an experience, to say the least. But to those of you who are about to be or have just been on reality television, especially the kind that includes the experiences listed above, expect some PTRSD.

For help or to tell your story, contact "The Tyra Show" ...

Not that we can actually take control, but we like to imagine we can. So if it were up to MTV News, who would be in the running? And what about loosening up some of the categories a bit and adding some extra awards? We polled ourselves, and here are our choices for the standard categories and some new ones:

Reality

We agree that "American Idol" and "Project Runway" are worthy, but what about "America's Best Dance Crew"? Or "The Paper"?

Best Reality Host: Mario Lopez ("America's Best Dance Crew"), Cat Deeley ("So You Think You Can Dance") and Tim Gunn ("Tim Gunn's Guide to Style")

Best WTF Moment in Reality: Spencer turns the apartment into a graffiti-covered arcade on "The Hills"; Tila Tequila is passed around in the hot tub by the final contestants' parents and stepparents; and Chris makes clothes out of human hair on "Project Runway"

Best Reality Fight: Dale vs. Lisa vs. Spike vs. Antonia vs. Jen on "Top Chef"

Least Necessary Comeback of a Reality Character: Janelle ("Real World: Hollywood")

Best Offscreen Performance By a Reality Star: Quinton "Rampage" Jackson ("Ultimate Fighter"). Two run-ins with police in 24 hours this week gave him a late surge at the polls, allowing him to overtake David Hasselhoff, Danny Bonaduce and both Coreys.

Comedy

We agree that "30 Rock" and "The Office" are great shows, but we'd also like to see "Californication," "Pushing Daisies," "Weeds" and "Flight of the Conchords" get a fair shot. As for individuals, we would nominate the following actors and actresses for an Emmy:

Best Lead Actor in a Comedy Series: Adrien Grenier in "Entourage," Josh Radnor in "How I Met Your Mother" and David Duchovny in "Californication"

Best Lead Actress in a Comedy Series: Sarah Silverman in "The Sarah Silverman Program," Miley Cyrus in "Hannah Montana" and Anna Friel in "Pushing Daisies"

Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series: John Krasinksi in "The Office," Tracy Morgan in "30 Rock," Jack McBrayer in "30 Rock" and Chi McBride in "Pushing Daisies"

Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series: Sarah Chalke in "Scrubs"/ "How I Met Your Mother," Jenna Fischer in "The Office," Jaime Pressly in "My Name Is Earl," Cheryl Hines in "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and Wanda Sykes in "The New Adventures of Old Christine"

Best Guest Actor/Actress in a Comedy Series: Britney Spears in "How I Met Your Mother," Mary-Kate Olsen in "Weeds," Vivica A. Fox in "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and Anna Faris in "Entourage"

Best WTF Moment in Comedy: The crew sings "Day Man" on "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" and Tyra Banks turns into a lizard on a "Family Guy" spoof of "America's Next Top Model"

Drama

Yes, "Lost" deserves a lot of Emmy love, but what about "The Wire"? Especially considering this is the last time we'd get to honor that show. Or "Heroes," "Friday Night Lights," "Breaking Bad" and "Battlestar Galactica" — you know, shows we actually watch? As for individuals, we would have nominated the following actors and actresses for an Emmy:

Best Lead Actor in a Drama Series: Matthew Fox in "Lost," Kyle Chandler in "Friday Night Lights" and Jonathan Rhys Meyers in "The Tudors"

Best Lead Actress in a Drama Series: Leighton Meester in "Gossip Girl," Evangeline Lily in "Lost," Chloë Sevigny in "Big Love" and Minnie Driver in "The Riches"

Best Supporting Actor in a Drama Series: Masi Oka in "Heroes," Andre Royo in "The Wire" and Naveen Andrews and Jorge Garcia in "Lost"

Best Supporting Actress in a Drama Series: Yunjim Kim in "Lost," Lisa Edelstein in "House," Connie Britton in "Friday Night Lights," Rose Byrne in "Damages" and Summer Glau in "Terminator: The Sarah Conor Chronicles"

Best Guest Actor/Actress in a Drama Series: Keith Carradine in "Dexter" and Aidan Quinn in "Law & Order: Special Victims Unit"

Best WTF Moment in Drama: Serena says she killed someone on "Gossip Girl"; the island disappears on "Lost"; and Omar is shot in the head on "The Wire"

Best Drama Character Who Kicked the Bucket: Omar (Michael K. Williams) on "The Wire," Charlotte "Chuck" Charles (Anna Friel) on "Pushing Daisies" and Amber (Anne Dudek) on "House"

Least Necessary Comeback of a Drama Character: Michael (Harold Perrieneau) on "Lost".

Miscellaneous

Here are a few more ideas we came up with that are beyond categorization:

Best Villain: Sylar (Zachary Quinto) on "Heroes" and Blair (Leighton Meester) on "Gossip Girl"

Best Canceled Show: "The Wire"

Best Foreign Show: "Skins"

Best "Everything You Know Is Wrong" Show: "Penn & Teller: Bullsh--!"

Best Guilty Pleasure: "The Hills"

Special Achievement in the Usage of TXT Language That Confirmed the Downfall of Mankind (Short Form): "Gossip Girl." Srsly. WTF.

Agree? Disagree? Have any suggestions that we or the Emmy voters should consider? Cast your vote below.

MTV has just greenlit an “Apprentice”-style reality competition in which 16 contestants try to prove their business savvy to none other than the G-Unit general himself, 50 Cent. Because, you know, Fiddy feels really strongly that America needs another “street-smart” business mogul.

Eight episodes have been ordered, with Fiddy on board not only as the latest incarnation of Donal Trump but also as one of the executive producers.

Question: If Trump has his unique hair-piece, what will Fiddy’s signature look be? The bulletproof vest seems sort of last year. Thoughts?

OK, this disturbs us.

In a press release that leads with “A tree isn’t the only thing growing in Brooklyn!,” our fine network has announced that the next season of that godfather of reality series, “The Real World,” will begin filming this summer…in Brooklyn. In Brooklyn!!

While the last season was in Hollywood, the 21st season returns to New York, where the series began -- although, you know, it technically began in Soho. Back when Soho was industrial and Chanel-free, and back when the very concept of being able to film strangers’ daily lives was mind-bending. This was also back in the days of Brenda and Brandon on “90210”…so it was a hell of a long time ago (as is painfully clear in the clip above: first episode ever!).

Now, we’re not part of the exalted team that actually decides high-power things like “programming,” but we’d place a $200 million bet that, as massive as Brooklyn is, this show’s specifically hitting the hipster haven that is Williamsburg. W’burg, the bell tolls for you! Oh, how many local indie-rock shows will be completely ruined by the filming of…twelve full-hour episodes??