· Thanks to a cameo by Britney Spears as a ditzy dermatologist's receptionist, "How I Met Your Mother" scored its highest ratings ever on Monday night. We can only imagine Amy Winehouse’s people are on the horn with the producers of "Two and a Half Men" right now.

· Bro-core punk legend, activist, biology professor. All that and Bad Religion singer Greg Graffin is getting a Lifetime Achievement Award in Cultural Humanism from Harvard University’s Humanist Chaplaincy for his work as an openly non-religious scientist studying religious beliefs among fellow brainiacs. Oh, and he’s going to play an acoustic set, too.

· Maybe the lure of delicious soda for the people will be what it finally takes for Axl Rose to get off the pot and deliver Chinese Democracy. Dr. Pepper hopes so, which is why the soda maker has offered to distribute a free can of the sugary sweetness to everyone in America (except Slash and Buckethead) if Rose unleashes the album in 2008. Um, they've even launched a blog about it. (What if it's the Scissor Sisters who release Chinese Democracy instead?

Hi, Axl.

So last week, MTV News got with Scissor Sisters songstress Ana Matronic in Brooklyn, during an anti-war benefit that also featured Lou Reed, David Byrne, Norah Jones and Moby. Um, yeah, we feel the same way.

Anyway, she let it be known that her band - a fun live show, if you ever get to see it - are calling their upcoming third album, well, Chinese Democracy.

So...not really. But we liked that they joked about it. Surely their lawyers are breathing a sigh of relief. A few years back, April 2003 to be exact, the Offspring announced they'd be naming their album, Chinese Democrazy (You Snooze, You Lose), but the merry pranksters eventually chose a different title after a convincing call from Axl's legal counsel.

To which we say, COME ON, SOMEONE NEEDS TO MAN-UP AND DO THIS. PLEASE??? Isn't there a statute of limitations on forever-in-the-making sixth albums?